Why do you believe that we were friends, my Love?

…Since July 2023 until March 2024 I sent him 14-15 messages most of them to his official IM account …In April 2024 I switched to The Library…and then sometime, somehow you appeared in The Library…I didn’t disclose who am I – until you asked me…so I deserve your incognito, since I did the same thing to him…I know that he read the messages – I sent one/ two messages per month…he was confused, wondering what I want from him…obviously; I didn’t dare to want anything, how could have I…? I just felt that I must tell him who he is, and to bring him joy…and it was all enveloped in a sense of urgency, and despair that I cannot reach out to him – and that he must read my messages even if they sound crazy…and I was worried almost all the time that something will happen, much before there were any signs of his disease…I also know that he visited The Library, but I don’t for how long… and I know I turned him upside down with the first post…this is all, my Love…