fridge-to-fridge confessions

This is the Fridge-to-Fridge (F2F) communication system. If it doesn’t work I may consider what spirits said and switch to pigeon post.

 

This is the first time in my life when I don’t make plans. My father was a military strategist, chief of combat plans division of the region. I probably shouldn’t write this here but he passed away 19 years ago. He taught me to be secretive – because of his function – and because he believed that I hold my head in the clouds – he told me to stay grounded and always have a plan/ strategy in situations which require resolution. He was right about the clouds but he didn’t know that my clouds are special allowing a unique perspective and that I am more grounded than he ever was, no matter the position of my head. Now I have an additional cloud, an aquamarine one, and I am more grounded than ever, this is why I don’t make plans. It doesn’t feel right. How could I possibly strategize a karmic surgery? With/ without anaesthetic? Frontal approach/ sneak around? Do I terminate a karmic contract or do I open a karmic debt? (It feels karmic, in fact, after so many years you can develop a karmic bond even with your armchair. Sad Sarcasm.) Terrible questions and choices. He feels the detachment but doesn’t know the reason. He watches me closely trying to understand. What am I writing, watching, hiding…my biggest secret: a Honey Bear going in and out from a fridge – Sad Laughs.

So, no planning, but I cannot just go with the flow either, nor rely purely on impulse reactions; it is not my nature. This is how I found the fridge. It is an in-within/ in-between planning and going with the flow. It is also an introspection and a healing chamber I think. 

I feel compassion and guilt but my coordinate system has irreversibly changed. I pleaded guilty and moved into the fridge.  I wanted to be alone with the inner knowledge of him; in the flow of his archetypal energies, studying the symbolism of his beauty.

 

I was focusing on The Alchemist and The Balance when The Lover has almost burned down my fridge with his fiery energy. I turned down the thermostat to minus – temporarily – to cool him down. I offered him to move to the Innocent’s fridge – in case he is cold – (they walk hand in hand anyway), or bear the cold until we can sneak out in the woods. Warm Smile. 

 

The Lover is not slowed down by the cold, nor willing to move to the Innocent’s fridge. Sweet, hot  challenge. I have filled a bucket with water – in case of overheat…Infinite Laughs.

 

Spirits are noisy; they say you think that “I let you in the cold”. I was about to declare them “spiritus non grata” and proceed with a second exile, this time from my R2 territory – firstly because the absurdity of their statement, secondly because I don’t like the expression; but what if they are right? Why would you think this? However, I give you reassurance that I will still be around when we both will be 100 yrs. old, even if only at the R1/ R2 border – either in my fridge, or playing around with my green tractor. Infinite Smile.